Truth can always be found even in emptiness and despair. The hard part is accepting it for what it really is. We blind ourselves to the prospect of truth, to the answers that lie within the dark wonders of the soul. It is much easier to live in this fictitious reality, but the day will come when you wake to darkness and what you believed is empty and gone. And the day will come when you catch your reflection, in a mirror, on the back on a spoon, in a puddle and you realize how empty you really are. A hollow cynic, an expert novice…a fabulous liar. And you’ll ask yourself “Is this what I’ve become?” trapped in a lifestyle of solitary confinement. All the drinks, all the bars…all the women, have equaled nothing. All they have brought is an inherited sadness that has been documented in blood and bar tabs. Strewn across pages of life. I think of the ones I’ve really loved and how I was never able to tell them. Always to scared of being crushed. Scattered into a million pieces and hung in the night sky. Branded a failure. These words are written on the eve of a new year. A day of alleged change, but will 24 hours make a difference? Will they change these years of failure and solitude? Or will all this elude me for an eternity? Will I be doomed to lay awake at night and imagine myself in their embrace? Or do people really change? If only time can tell, then I hope it’s soon, because I’m running out. 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1….
Monday, December 31, 2007
Saturday, December 15, 2007
Infamy
Sunday, December 9, 2007
Path to the Guardians of Salvation
The Dialogue Of Love, Will Tear Us Apart
Sunday, December 2, 2007
Brothers in Arms
Modern Savage
Sunday, November 18, 2007
Safe and Sound
Monday, November 12, 2007
Princess with a Pension in Peril and Thinking about Loss Prevention
Princess sailing on the dawn of sorrow
she asks,
when will it be tomorrow?
When will tomorrow be today?
And how long has it been…
Since we ran away?
And how long have we been…
Sailing this bruised ocean?
And how long has it been…
Since we ran out of that feel good potion?
I long for you,
instant gratification.
I long for a little,
fornication
…Of the heart and soul.
But your hard heart
bound in cement shoes
is too far gone now
so take me here
under the watchful eye of the moon
under the blank sky that reflects our bruised ocean.
Replace my feel good potion
make me forget why we ran away
make me forget about today
bring tomorrow on your lips
confessions made in our hips
…And may the moon forgive us for this.
Los Angeles
The guardian of our fair city
perched in the sad sky,
the patron saint of last call.
Sitting in your throne
you watch us stumble off our stools
we howl like mad men,
cry like children.
and pour out our hearts
like inmates at last confession.
Dreamers with hope in their eyes,
artists with sorrow in their hearts
you beseech us,
all the same.
You watch over us.
And here in your home,
at the end of the world.
We sit.
Hourglass
In the silence of our surrender
we’d become fragmented shells
of our former selves,
responding only to physical impulses.
We were lost to the world
wandering the dark abyss
that is our lives,
looking for that blinding light,
that white flash of hope
that we once shared.
But this is the life we’ve been given
despite all our parents prayers.
And as this moment passes to obscurity,
a passage in time that no one will remember
we’re dragged across existence
like a lazy southern drawl
and covered with the slurred comfort of eternity.
We have become footnotes
in the history of the world.
Once day these shackles of sin and sorrow
will be broken.
The key kept inside a beating heart,
my siren of freedom that wanders this dirty valley.
Dear Summer
The persuasive thoughts
of yesterday haunt me.
Longing for a nostalgic embrace
but remember those late nights drives
oceans and lighthouses
the Boss’ voice pushed out those old speakers.
A lullaby for the lonely,
the quiet sadness that haunted us.
Remember, until your broken arms
mend around a fading smile.
‘Cause it fades with the season,
and yeah bay,
“We burned out.”
So fade away to the tune of Thunder Road
and look back on me with a smile,
‘Cause summer romance
end at dawn.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Sunrise On The Face Of Dawn
In the seemingly endless desperation of youth
a pebble becomes a boulder
a kiss becomes a passionate love affair
a quiet conversation becomes a haunting destiny.
It’s through our brothers and sisters
through sinners and saints
that we are acquainted with life and death.
As the blurred chaos of this war,
of this struggle;
as our lives rage on
my eyes catch a glimpse of glory
perfection personified in a beauty beyond words
a flash of a smile that forgave me of my sins.
Her embrace was home.
The look in her eyes was the magic of being reborn,
of looking at a world of endless possibility.
My heart drowned in her brown ocean
swirling with the tide
kissed by perfection, the way the sea kisses the shore.
So smile because we have youth,
Smile because we have love,
Smile because we have each other,
Smile because nothing will ever be this good again.
And always remember the mornings
we’d wake up on the sand still dreaming
still living.
Kids waiting for their lives to begin,
For their dreams to be over.
But I’ll never forget the stars in your eyes
or the sunrise on your face.
So always remember the mornings I’d hold you close and whisper in your ear
“Life is at our door, morning is at our window
and our whole lives are ahead of us”.
Saturday, October 27, 2007
Alcohol + The Power of Myth= Casey's Eternal Thoughts
dance we have within ourselves. The minds passing of judgment on simple
situations. Heaven and hell are the minds limitations. The framework by
which we judge our current situations (i.e. pleasantries vs. non
pleasantries). Along with time and narcissism they are what prevent us as
a species from expressing our full potential.
Eternity is the passing moment with no reflex to the concept of time. The
minds ability to exist without restraint is in fact the moment when the
body transcends itself and becomes one with the eternity which surrounds
it. The notion of heaven and hell as an afterlife or something that begins
the second you cease to live is contrary to the concept that is eternity.
If heaven and hell are eternal then they exist as we exist. They are
limitless and without end. No beginning and no ending. Heaven and hell
transcend the implications and limits we put on them, and, just like the
mind are various states of being.
The notion of eternity, beginning when we cease, is the human mind trying
to wrap its limitations on a tangible state. The moment the mind exists
without restraint or knowledge of itself is a moment of eternity. When the
mind is free of such implications and merely exists in situations without
reflex or the passing of any judgment, we in turn become divine. We can
then observe things objectively, without any restraining implications.
Once the mind is allowed to flex its limitless potential, we are allowed to
transcend the physical realm and enter an eternity of enlightenment.
Heaven and hell are the minds perceptions of the life the vessel leads.
Rather than being an afterlife they are the minds waking reflex to the
situations it is presented with. They are subjective states of being that
we create to pass judgment on ourselves. Henceforth once the mind is able
to exist without judgment or the confines we place on it we will evolve
from the notions of heaven and hell and merely exist with eternity.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
History Always Repeats Itself
And here we are again
full circle.
Breakdown,
rebuild
each time with greater intent.
Traced over and emphasized.
A reorganization,
a reexamination
of this cesspool
of this tainted species
of this file cabinet lifestyle.
colorless,
thoughtless,
genderless slaves
whipped by a time clock
maimed by a cubicle
stripped of their identity
by a managerial house slave;
a lapdog to the dollar.
My friend,
you are still one of us!
You are still a cog in a deteriorating
lifestyle obsession gone awry.
We are the Egyptians.
We are the Romans.
We are the Aztecs.
We will become the nothingness that ensues.
We will fade into obscurity
scrutinized for our lack of life,
our lack of meaning.
Tomorrow morning,
the workforce drowning in their efficiency
will wake up to their deaths.
But who will write their obituaries?
Thursday, September 27, 2007
Robert Frost
Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.
My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.
He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.
The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.
Sunday, September 9, 2007
Coming Home
Coming Home
These melancholy nights,
cool California comfort.
Close your eyes baby
close your eyes and fly.
Let the dirty breeze take you.
Broken hearts and the Santa Anna’s
will float you through forever.
So just close you eyes and put your faith in the horizon.
‘Cause we can lay back and watch it all float by…
We’ll be kids again, lying on our backs watching clouds take shape.
So watch the stars
‘cause tonight they’ll shine just for you.
We’ll spend the rest of our lives
…just blowin in the wind,
we’re just blowin in the wind
Through the country side
and in-between busy cities.
So just let go baby.
Just let go…
even if I’m not the one,
just gimme a go.
Forever is just around the corner
And yeah baby I got my flaws
but I cut that anchor loose,
so can you.
So just let go baby
Just let go.
Cry your eyes out and put your faith in the horizon,
‘cause tonight we’re just blowin in the wind.
And flash me that smile
the one I love
the one that always seems to makes a cameo
and promise you’ll just let go.Tuesday, July 3, 2007
Miles To Go Before I Sleep
Summer time is upon us yet again ladies and gents, and we all know what this means. Expensive gas, sun block, flip flops, Casey's birthday and of course the traveling. For all of you who might be doing some driving or traveling this summer I have come up with a new mixtape for just that occasion. Its a double disk folk/acoustic/alt-country mixtape perfect for driving across the California desert. So without further Adu, I present Miles To Go Before I Sleep.
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
“Says He’s Held Up With Holding On And On And On And On And On”
Your knight in shining armor
Your prince on a pedestal
The best decision of your life.
Cause I’ve choked on these words for so many nights,
And now they’re choking me up.
The things you’ll never know
The things I never told you.
Those nights…
Those nights we were young,
We’d walk the empty streets and sing our favorite songs.
Those nights we’d sit on the curb and smoke cigarettes.
We were all we needed to be.
Well I just needed you to know that…
The nights laced with electricity and life,
They will be the only thing I take with me, forever.
So when you look back on the things you’ve done,
And the decisions you’ve made
Think of me.
And those nights.
Cause I’ll be laying in my bed face up,
And thinking of your smile.
So when he tells you
“This won’t mean a thing…”
Remember he’s who you wanted.
And for the record,
“I’m held up with holding on”
So may you achieve everything you’ve ever wanted
And if you can…
Never look back.
Cause when you do,
You’ll see the person you left behind.
Sunday, June 17, 2007
Says he's held up with holding on and on and on and on and on
"I've choked on these words for so many nights, and now they're choking me up" I wrote that line about a year or two ago and for some reason they still ring quite true. Its funny how we can only run for so long. I've been thinking about this girl again, the one that I always blog about. The girl I'm always bitching about. And its like a fucking disease. For some reason she just always creeps into my life in some way or another. And the best part is it's always in a strange subliminal way. For example lately all I've been listening to is tell all your friends by taking back Sunday. Now I've been spinnin that record since I was probably 15 maybe 16 years old. Don't get me wrong, its a good record, but I couldn't fucking stop listening to it. And tonight I figured out why. It was that summer I laid eyes on the woman that would haunt me the rest of my life. The woman that I was damned to love. you'll never know. And I'll never have you. But those nights, they were th best nights of my life. Those nights we were young. Those nights we'd walk the lonely streets and sing our favorite songs. Those nights that we'd sit on curbs and smoke cigarettes. Those nights...those nights when all we were was all we needed to be. Well I just needed you to know that, those night. Those nights laced with electricity and magic, those nights will be all I take with me, Forever. So when you look back on the things you've done, and the decisions you've made. Think of me and think of those nights, because I'll be laying down in my bed face up, awake, thinking of your smile. So when things get hard, and he says he never loved you. Remember, I did. And when he says ""this won’t mean a thing come tomorrow, Cause I'm still not sleeping, thinking I’ve crawled home from worse than this." Remember that he's who you wanted. And For the record, I'm done. I'm held up with holding on. May you achieve everything you've ever wanted, and if you can, never look back, cause when you do...You'll see all the people you left behind.
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
in·sid'i·ous-1. Working or spreading harmfully in a subtle or stealthy manner
Speak to me those sad insidious words
You use so well.
A perfected phrase of happy sorrow,
Words that flow over our heads
And down with our drinks.
Words that haunt only me.
So just go ahead and pretend,
Pretend I’m him…
The mean of your dreams,
The man you loved before
Everything went wrong.
Speak
And let your body speak the words
You can never say.
Because lets face it love,
I’m not much…
But I’m better than being alone.
So speak to me
Speak to me the cool peppermint words of hope
The heavy words of sorrow
And your empty words of love
Saturday, April 21, 2007
They're sharing a drink they call loneliness...But it's better than drinkin' alone
Saturday, April 14, 2007
Last Chance To Make Your Biggest Regret
Untitled
She cries out to me
That sad beseechment
Quiet sublime
Like Miles’ soft horn
On Flamenco Sketches
"Come home to me
Come home to me
In the quiet whisper
Of a warm summers night”
…Cause you know
“I was a pencil tip away
From doing something stupid”
But all those little white lies
“They keep me up nights”
Say what you will baby
(And feed the rumors to the mill)
Because I’m two drinks away
From proving everything you’ve
Ever said about me
(But just keep talking baby, just keep talking)
Cause come last call
I’m coming clean
(So what do you want to hear?)
“She was a friend of a friend”
Twice removed
Or that we…
“Fucked in the bathroom?”
(But just keep talking precious, just keep talking)
Cause I’m not the one with something to prove
(What are you trying to?...)
Life is full of disappointments
I’m no different
So what are you trying to prove?
(Cause the truth will…)
Cause the truth is,
I can hold out much longer than you.
Wednesday, March 7, 2007
_ _ _ _ _ _ _....fill in the blanks
Saturday, February 24, 2007
A Bob Marley Type Of Mood
Why have you forsaken me?
Abandoned in the wasteland of my life
Left to search for substance in an empty land
A land filled with the propaganda of your false profits
All so that they might increase the profits in their pockets
White picket profits
With deep pockets
Spew their sewer propaganda
Poisoning the ocean of the masses
Picking people apart
Picking ME apart
Picking apart my art
Saying I’m possessed
Saying “I’m not impressed”
I don’t give a fuck if your impressed
And maybe I am possessed
Not by demons or devils
But by sense
I am a living protest
I can not be pacified by
False profits with deep pockets
We are not commodities to
Be bought and sold
It doesn’t matter how many times we are told
We will overcome
I will carry the flag into battle
We will rage!
We will rage against the dieing of the light!
Sunday, January 14, 2007
You Know Who You Are (I Hope Not)
The sun fights its way through the blinds
Holding Me hostage
Bringing me back to reality.
A life of emptyness,
Gone is the perfection of sleep,
Gone is the girl I will dream of the rest of my life...
Sunday, January 7, 2007
Flamenco Sketches
Use commas sparingly
The dramatic indecision of time lay in that bed with us, in between us, around us, covering us in a womb of guilt. Soon urgency flooded into the room and covered me, a hazy fog that made me sick. But I had not developed an escape plan, held at bay the prisoner of this electrifying urgency and guilt. Shackled the the woman beside me...powerless.
Friday, January 5, 2007
Breath the open city
Dirty and Polluted
...Home sweet home
Drink in its history
In old town dive bars
While you hear stories
Of a fall from grace
Caged in a crowded cubicle
I long for the sadness
Projected in the faces of the forgotten
The song of a broken man's croon come last call
Los Angeles
Fair Verona
Take me in
Make me yours
Show me everything that once was
And could never be
Here in the city of lost angels
We welcome the broken
The down and damned
Tell us your stories
Make us your history
Leave your black mark
On our dirty streets
...And never look back
Princess With A Pension In Peril And Thinking About Loss Prevention
Princess sailing on the dawn of sorrow
she asks:
When will it be tomorow?
When will tomorow be today?
And how long has it been...
Since We ran away?
And how long have we been...
Sailing this bruised ocean?
And how long has it been since we ran out of that feel good potion?
I thurst for you
Instant Gratification
I long for a little
Fornication
...Of the heart and soul
But your hard heart
Bound in cement shoes
Is too far gone now
So take me here
Under the watchful eye of the moon
Under the blank sky that reflects our bruised ocean
Become
Replace my feel good potion
Make me forget why we ran away
Make me forget about today
Bring tomorow on your lips
Confessions made between our hips
...And may the moon forgive us for this